Episode #426 – Permission to Pause

This is episode 426 of the Brilliant Balance Podcast, and today I want to give you permission to pause. I’m so delighted that you tuned into the show this week, in the middle of what I am confident is a sacred week of rest. I hope it is for you and for your family and your loved ones, and it just means a lot to me that you would press play on an episode in a week like this.

And I thought a lot about what message I would want to give you if we were having a conversation this week—like a real conversation over coffee, maybe—where you really were asking, “What do you think? What do I need to do this week?” And I know the podcast is just a one-way dialogue. It doesn’t really let us have a back-and-forth discussion. But even with that, if I were guessing, the message I would most want to give you is kind of a permission slip.

Permission to step out of the normal rhythm of your life for a minute and let yourself sink into the moments that are right there in front of you.

And it’s harder than it sounds, right? Because you’re probably a lot like me. I can get into a week like this and think, “Oh, what a great opportunity to get caught up.” You know—I’m going to do all the things: clean out the closets. And it’s just not what this week is for. And we don’t get that many of them, right? If you have that desire to kind of get caught up—to reorganize your email inbox, or get ahead on your January projects, or just squeeze in a few things while everyone else is resting—I want you to challenge what is driving that behavior.

And what if you actually let yourself press pause for a minute? Not forever, right? I think the reason we don’t do it—the reason there’s resistance—is that something in us says, “If I slow down for a minute, or if I sit down, or if I take a rest, I’m never going to start again.” You know? “I’m going to kick off this chain reaction of resting, and that’s going to be it for me.”

So that’s not the point here. The point is to do it just long enough to remember what it feels like to move through a day without pushing. Just to let the rhythm of the day be the rhythm of the day, and not push it to be something else. Just to walk into your living room and notice the way the light is affecting the room.

You know, to maybe hang out in the kitchen for a little bit after dinner—not to clean up after anyone, but just to be there. Maybe in the morning, to sit with that cup of coffee and no to-do list.

Radical idea, I know. Or to laugh with your kids without thinking about what time it is and what you need to be doing next. Really to feel yourself being in your life instead of managing it.

Because I think when we rush through this week, we miss a lot, right? If we try to turn this into a catch-up week—or even if we’re not catching up, if we’re just barreling through the holidays at our normal pace, where we wake up in the morning and the shot clock goes off and we’re trying to be fast and efficient and vigilant through the whole thing—we miss those tiny glimmers of magic that show up in this season. And they’re harder to spot at other times of year, right?

You miss those really slow mornings when the house is mercifully quiet—no one is up yet. Not the littles, if you have them; not the college kids, if they’re home. Just you and your thoughts. And that is magic.

Or the way your teenager looks, just for one second, the way they did when they were little—and you catch that curve of their jaw, or that expression they used to make, and it takes you back.

Or those little inside jokes that happen when you get families back together—but they only really unfold at their natural cadence when you’re not watching the clock. Right? When you’re not trying to hurry everybody on to the next thing.

When you’re rushing through the holidays, you miss the spontaneous walk you were going to say no to because you had things to do—but you went anyway. Or you miss that chance to just exhale.

And I want that for you. And I hope you want that for yourself. Because what happens inside of you when you stop performing all the acts of productivity and you just let yourself be human? There is renewal that happens in that. There is restoration that happens in that, and it will be really important as you ramp back up.

Your creativity resets. Your intuition finds its voice. Your priorities get clearer—really clear sometimes—when there’s nothing sitting on top of them, clamoring for attention. Your priorities clarify almost magically.

And then you go back to your work and you go back to the rhythms of your life with a sense of groundedness that you can’t manufacture when you’re trying to get ahead, right? Those things are just at odds with each other. And I think going into the new year with groundedness would be really powerful.

So this week has its own cadence. It has its own texture. It’s a week that can slip by if we’re not careful, but there’s a permission slip in here if you let yourself take it.

OK—let the pause do its work. And if you need someone to say it out loud, I’ll be that person: You do not have to earn your rest this week.

You don’t have to. You don’t have to justify it. You can let undone things stay undone. You can step out of the rush and just be for a minute.

You can let the emails wait. You can let the projects wait. You can let a lot of it wait, just to be in this week. This is the week for presents—for connection, for laughter and naps, and just the chance to be with your people. For movies that you’ve seen a dozen times. For long dinners that don’t have to be rushed away from the table. For messy joy all around you. And I want you to sink into that and let this week hold you.

It’s so important that we learn to challenge those expectations that we live under all year. And I think maybe no week is more important than this one, when so many of us take a collective pause. If you tried to do this on a random week in October, the pace of everyone else’s life would continue to accelerate. But here, you have some good company, with lots of us taking the opportunity to breathe.

OK, so let yourself be here—in this season, with these people, in this moment. You can pick everything back up next week. It will all be there waiting for you.

But if you do this well, you will be different—in the best possible way. And we will be waiting to meet you on the other side with another year of brand-new episodes. We’re going to be standing on the precipice of New Year’s Eve when the next episode drops. And we’re going to be ready to catch you on the other side and really help you open up your life in the year ahead in ways that will be courageous and exciting and big.

But this is the week to just be you. Just settle in, take a breath, be with your people, and enjoy the holiday. Happy holidays from me to you.